Courageous Conversations

"Why are you listening to them?"

Sheila has been receiving complaints about Kristy's management behavior from a variety of sources around Kristy - direct reports, other managers, etc. Most of these folks are so upset and dismayed by the behaviors that they would like to see Kristy fired. And they can't really understand why that hasn't happened yet.

Sheila has not seen these behaviors herself, but the chatter has gotten so loud that she decides she needs to talk to Kristy about this information. (13:05).

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Lessons Learned:

• Be prepared - Just like the Boy Scouts. Take a few minutes before initiating the conversation to determine what is the outcome you want to achieve.

• Be specific - Do your due diligence.

• Encourage others - Encourage others to talk directly to each other. Offer help and guidance to do that.

• Reaffirm the relationship - First thing Kristy was worried about - “Am I getting fired?”

• Create a plan - How are you going to find out what is true and what isn’t.

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Going Beyond Diversity Training - Part Three

"Leaders need to show themselves, declare a future, and stand for their people."

I continue the conversation with Ted Santos, CEO of Turnaround Investment Partners and his article, "Going Beyond Diversity Training." In this episode, Ted and I talk about how do we close the gap between where we are and where we need to be. (17:15)

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Ted's answer is to help leaders to change their language to "declare a future." A future that we can all rally behind. A future that can transcend the issues of race, gender, culture, orientation. A future that is bigger than any one individual.

Check out a couple other articles from Ted Santos: The Dilemma of Creating Problems and Just Change Your Mind.

Talk to you soon, Tim.

"This is why I only like to hire guys"

Ralph, the sales manager, is very pleased with the numbers that Ed, his direct report, produces each month - the best in the division. The “what” of Ed’s work is beyond question. Today’s conversation is about the “how.” (10:00).

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Lessons Learned:

• Ease into it - Ralph needs Ed to stay in the conversation with him and hear what he has to say. Sart with something you appreciate about Ed’s success

• Be certain - Ratchet up the consequences and specificity as it goes along. Don't get sidetracked and stick with what you know.

• Be specific - Be as specific as you can as about which words, phrases or situations you are talking about.

• Reaffirm the relationship - Be willing to be “buddy-buddy” with him if you think it will help.

• Multiple conversations - Ed may screw-up again. Be willing to keep raising this topic.

Manhattan Chamber of Commerce: The G Quotient

Jun-19-2007, 7:15 PM to 10:30 PM

For more information and to register, visit the Manhattan Chamber of Commerce

Join the Manhattan Chamber of Commerce for an evening with author, Kirk Snyder. Snyder will highlight some findings from his new book and will tell us why gay executives in some of the world’s most prestigious companies are outperforming all other managers, why their employees are more engaged, satisfied, loyal and productive and why this matters to you and your company.

After the discussion, join the Chamber for a Networking Reception in Asia Society’s Garden Court Café, complete with open bar and hors d’oeuvres.

I can't actually be there myself, but it seems like it could be an interesting evening and thought you might be interested.

Talk to you soon, Tim.